Memories.. sometimes a frustration

Why we were asked to apart and what is going with me now, is a chain of pains. I wish if everything turns settled within a single breathe but I don’t know where I am going and why my emotions, sometimes, get so high that hurt me like dehydration of emotions, stress of love in life and why all such rubbishes are happening with me.

Why don’t I become happy like before I was with my sweetheart, what would be the wrong if I will smile with her again, what would be so wrong if we will discuss really important for us.

Trust me, this period is a slow poison which is affecting my emotions and I have to either ignore or think deeply about it to get some relief by wasting a lot of time. Why this wrong is happening with me? Alright, then what is next… How long I have to wait for next period to get shit done over.

This loneliness, no-companion, missing life, being everywhere and still nowhere, so-called laughs and smiles works like hell to make me feel sad, quite, thoughtless for a while and full of thoughts another minute.

Sometimes, I feel I am getting philosophical but I hate that, I really hate that. I hate looking back, I don’t want to miss her, why should I think about her. Its fine, we spent a lot of time with each other but now, things are changed then why that old chapters are disturbing me, what they are doing in my current path. I haven’t invited them then why they poke me and take me back to such bullshit memories that have no business today.

I am not a fighter to deal with this pain, I don’t believe in pills, I want a beautiful life, please go away, I have no more space for you. I have no more space for you, bullshit.

My Lord Shiva is taking care of me and keeping me save from such meaningless darks. My life has a lot to work, enjoy and to live. My Baba is my creator, protector and my destroyer; there is nothing can disturb me for long, he has an eye on me, beware.

Go away and let me work on my beautiful life.

Bye.

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